Bible passage:
True unity after one sibling cheats another: Gen 27:19, 30, 38, Gen 33:1, 3, 4, 10 Jacob said to his father, “I am Esau your firstborn. I have done as you told me; now sit up and eat of my game, that your soul may bless me.” As soon as Isaac had finished blessing Jacob, when Jacob had scarcely gone out from the presence of Isaac his father, Esau his brother came in from his hunting. Esau said to his father, “Have you but one blessing, my father? Bless me, even me also, O my father.” And Esau lifted up his voice and wept.
And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, He himself went on before them, bowing himself to the ground seven times, until he came near to his brother. But Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept. Jacob said, “No, please, if I have found favor in your sight, then accept my present from my hand. For I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me.
Unsettled hurts/ sins leading to irreparable damage: 2 Sam 13: 1, 11, 14, 15, 20, 22, 28 Now Absalom, David's son, had a beautiful sister, whose name was Tamar. And after a time Amnon, David's son, loved her. But when she brought them near him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, “Come, lie with me, my sister.” But he would not listen to her, and being stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her with very great hatred. So Tamar lived, a desolate woman, in her brother Absalom's house. When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry. But Absalom spoke to Amnon neither good nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had violated his sister Tamar. Then Absalom commanded his servants, “Mark when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, ‘Strike Amnon,’ then kill him.
Power, Property, Envy, Miscommunication, Discrimination, Dishonor, and Doctrinal differences are all reasons for which disagreements may rise between family members or close friends. Bible mentions many stories of disagreements, disunity, and divisions between people of the same household, or even good friends. It definitely is an extremely painful situation, as described by David in Psalm 41:9 Even my close friend in whom I trusted, who ate my bread, has lifted his heel against me.
God's choice of Jacob may be beyond our understanding. Yet, let's look at the reconciliation process of Jacob and Esau. There seems to be an acknowledgment that Esau was cheated and understandably angry. There is a temporary separation. There is genuine repentance from Jacob. There is repentance in action by the offering of gifts, and bowing down and lowering of oneself. THEN, there is forgiveness. God blesses Jacob, and God blesses Esau also, commanding Israel to not provoke them, and that Edom's land will not be given to Israel [Deut 2:5]. It ends well!
Let's now look at a bad example. When Amnon rapes Tamar, as a father, David should have taken action. As a King, David should have issued punishment. He did neither. He probably thought he was maintaining a superficial unity in the family, and loving Amnon as much as he loved Tamar. Sadly, he loses Amnon to Absalom and loses Absalom to rage and revenge. This is such a tragic end!
There are cases where misunderstanding and differing opinions lead to separation. Let's pray that the family members are able to resolve or live together through love and forbearance. Yet, where there are cases of true hurt and offense, let's pray that those who committed the offense would repent and seek reconciliation and that those who are hurt would forgive and also lovingly/ sacrificially reconcile. For such is true unity that pleases the Father. Let's strive for no other lesser forms of unity.
Prayer points:
Pray that families learn to handle disagreements well, discuss without getting hurt, and persevere in truly and deeply knowing and respecting each other.
Pray that those who are in the wrong, are convicted by the Holy Spirit, acknowledge them, confess, and seek reconciliation.
Pray that those who have been hurt would receive comfort from God, forgive the family member/ close friend, and seek God's help to love them.
Pray that any form of selfishness, pride, envy, rage or lust wouldn't come in the way of a deep godly relationship between family members/ close friends.
If you can, try memorizing Psalm 133:1.
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